Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Making friends in the city
My husband and I have really tried to invest in our city, to get to know our neighbors, to reach out to new people, and to try to be hospitable. We find it takes hard work to make friends for our family and for our kids. I think much of this comes from being in the city--people are more cautious than in smaller towns or more close-knit suburbs. This is also New England, so people (myself included) have a natural reserve and can be slow to warm up. I have been combating this in my own nature for years because I want to have a vital connection to community.
Nearly all of my homeschooling friends I have met on the internet and through various Yahoo groups, including the one I started. This took me a while to get used to--at first it felt so much like a blind date when I would meet someone at the park or museum that I would almost get nervous. Once I started relaxing, it became an adventure.
"Okay, kids, we're going to the Ecotarium today and we're going to meet our friends!"
"Who, Mami?"
"Well, I don't know for sure if anyone you know is going to be there, but we'll meet some other homeschooling friends today."
And I put on my best Indiana Jones adventure hat and off we go. I'm glad that I have pushed myself to do this because I have met lots of really nice people I otherwise never would have. Now, when we go to some group activity, there are usually a few people that I know in the group, and I can let the kids know who will be there that is around their age or interested in the same things as they are. Sometimes, there is even a friend or two for each child. Those are the days that I really feel blessed.
The other thing that I have appreciated about this is the wide spectrum of people we have met. In case you haven't noticed, homeschoolers are far from cookie-cutter people. I am constantly surprising my non-homeschooling friends and family by sharing with them the wide variety of homeschoolers there are. In spite of the wide differences in motivation or style, all homeschoolers share a deep love for their kids and a high priority on family time and education. This common ground goes a long way in bridging other differences.
Nearly all of my homeschooling friends I have met on the internet and through various Yahoo groups, including the one I started. This took me a while to get used to--at first it felt so much like a blind date when I would meet someone at the park or museum that I would almost get nervous. Once I started relaxing, it became an adventure.
"Okay, kids, we're going to the Ecotarium today and we're going to meet our friends!"
"Who, Mami?"
"Well, I don't know for sure if anyone you know is going to be there, but we'll meet some other homeschooling friends today."
And I put on my best Indiana Jones adventure hat and off we go. I'm glad that I have pushed myself to do this because I have met lots of really nice people I otherwise never would have. Now, when we go to some group activity, there are usually a few people that I know in the group, and I can let the kids know who will be there that is around their age or interested in the same things as they are. Sometimes, there is even a friend or two for each child. Those are the days that I really feel blessed.
The other thing that I have appreciated about this is the wide spectrum of people we have met. In case you haven't noticed, homeschoolers are far from cookie-cutter people. I am constantly surprising my non-homeschooling friends and family by sharing with them the wide variety of homeschoolers there are. In spite of the wide differences in motivation or style, all homeschoolers share a deep love for their kids and a high priority on family time and education. This common ground goes a long way in bridging other differences.
